Monday, November 24, 2008

Going Postal

I need to quit getting the mail. If I just stopped faithfully going out there every day and opening up that little dungeon of doom and gloom, I would be a much happier woman.

I usually dash out there because
1) I have clothes on and
2) just in case I bounced a check, I want to keep it to my own self.
Love letters and bounced check notices are very private things, don't you think?

Today in the mail I had the following:

My Smooshy order (this was the bright spot)
One jury summons for the week of, YES WAY, 12/22 (oh, ack) I bet i can get out of that because I don;t want to go. I'll call Becky and ask to go when I'm actually at work. And then maybe I'll get a big honky murder case that goes on for like 18 months. That sounds good. Team Becky.

One bill for $190.76 for a car repair.
One bill for $235.22 for vet bills. Yes, I did take in all three dogs.

No fewer than five desperate pleas for MONEY from assorted charities who are all “feeling the pinch” and who have clients who “need us now more than ever.” One of them was Victory outreach. ENOUGH SAID.

The newspaper thinks it is going to be hitting me up for $20 a month every four weeks, which would make the Sentinal"worth" $260 a year, which is well, no, I don’t think so., even with dancing girls. (What are they smoking down there ?) There is NOTHING going on in Hanford that is worth $20 in a YEAR. There is nothing going on in FRESNO that is worth $20 in a year.

Home owners insurance renewal forms.

Oh look. Holt Lumber wants some money. So does Loewe's, Home Depot, Target, Amazon and Chevron.

Gottschalks, however, who hooked up with China, wants to up my limit. I'm boycotting them. They can keep their limit.

Notice from my personal banking account informing me that,AS OF RIGHT NOW they are going to be putting the required hold on my deposited state check. No more giving me cash because they gave me the check a day early. Yeah, I knew that and all…but still.

Is it National Poke Chloe With A Stick Day today, and nobody told me? I mean, I would have dressed nicer if I’d only known

Chase has a change in terms…lessee…soooooo, if I were to use their card and have a balance, I’d pay 20.9% interest on it? Memo to me: Tell Chase to go chase their own tails…ha ha ha…

Oh, looky here! It looks like money....from a district I worked at a long time ago! Yesss! Yesss! Could come at a better time!........except I can;t get at it for anothe r ten years so why did they bother to even send it to me?

Holy moley.

That’s it.

No more mail. I mean it! I am never going out to that stupid box again. It’s nothing but trouble, and I’m sick of it.

From this day forth…no more mail.
I'll just go out and check for those little square love notes from the back and then split.
No news is good news.


PERBS said...

With email, all I get is ads and bills but maybe with Christmas coming up, I might get a few cards.

I had jury duty recently but it was just for a car accident/hospital bills. I wanted to make them pay one cent to the person who caused the accident. lol Finally we decided nothing for him and bare medical bills for her but it took only 5 of the 6 of us for a verdict so I didn't have to vote giving them anything.
lol You should have seen their previous medical records stack!

I have never had a credit card although the offers keep coming in.

PERBS said...

Just saw your note on my bench blog about the elevator bench. . . they are working on updating our elevators and it takes 3 months for each. It has been the pits the last 5 weeks with just one elevator for 150 apartments!! Will you install your own elevator or have someone do it for you? Every year, they come and inspect it and put up a new sticker that it has been looked at and is approved. Yes, when you get yours installed, be sure to include a bench. I always rest my groceries on it.